Monday, January 25, 2016

Jan 25 - Potpourri

So, as the title suggests, this is going to be another mish-mash sort of post.

A) User Error (PART THREE) - apparently, my insurance card was right, and my insurance did run out on January 8th. (So, technically, I was without insurance for a couple o' weeks. o3o)

My dad and I went over to USC Upstate and switched me over to the Prime Young Adult plan. It is an extra however much per month, but hey, at least I have insurance. PTL for that.

(However, I know that IF my dad knew I was writing about this on the Internet for all the world to see, he would have a cow, a pig, an entire barnyard. So, please, if you see him, don't tell 'im. o3o)

((Also, technically I was breaking the law, wasn't I? By not being insured? o.O / o3o *shhhh*))

B) My Jan term is going well. The final day to drop a class passed (I had it on my calendar), and I didn't drop the class I was considering dropping. Huzzahs for that.

C) I wrote for myself today (!!!!!!!). Yes, it was only the end of a flash fiction prompt posted somewhere on the Interwebz, but, HEY! WRITING FOR SELF! SUPER DUPER HUZZAHS!

D) I went to the gym today. c: I believe that exercise releases endorphins, lol. xD

E) I have a copy of the book "Ben Carson: Rx for America" by John Philip Sousa IV, and, honestly, I don't plan on finishing it. I know it's meant to sway me to want to vote for Carson, but considering I'm already on Team Carson (I have donated to him, bought a shirt, all that jazz), I feel as if my time could be better spent doing other things (such as writing this blog post, lol xD).

F) This is the final week of Jan term. I need to write this final essay for Poe/Hoffman, make changes to my stories for Advanced Tutorial, then pack for Converge, a BCM retreat down in Myrtle Beach. We are leaving on my birthday, so I'm not going to see my Dad on my birthday (:c), but I believe I will be making the right choice by going to Converge. It will be nice to get out of the 'Burg for awhile, ha. xD

G) I sent a tentative resume for review about a Spring internship. Fingers crossed? Idk. It's not the internship I wanted (I got [nicely] turned down for that one, but if I think it would be good for me to get more experience.) ((Unfortunately, this internship is unpaid, but hey, most are, ha. xD))

Dear Lord,

Thank You for this day. Thank You for all the blessings You have poured out over me. Good gravy in the morning knows I don't know the future, but You do (and that's what matters <3 p="">
Please be with me as I enter this, my final semester of my undergraduate career. Please give me guidance / direction / all that jazz re: my future.

(Also, please be with America as we go into this next election cycle. Please give the American people wisdom as we choose our next leader. Please let our next leader make the best possible decisions, regardless of party line.)

((Also, also, please be with the refugees, all of them. Ik that many are worried [for good reason] about ISIS whatnots, and Muslims, etc. Please... resolve this issue?))

(((Also, also, also, please be with Germany. Please. [If I may be selfish for a moment, I would really like to return one day. o3o])))

In Your name, Lord,
Amen <3 p="">

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

January 20 - Simming it Up - Round 2

I saw my old suitemate from last year just now. Long story short, I am happy I'm not rooming with her anymore. :x

However, she did show up a few days ago at my Work Study. I was manning the desk, so she had to talk to me (I don't think she would have otherwise). She asked a question, or directions, or something, and I answered to the best of my knowledge.

Right now, we are both in the library. I had to go to the bathroom and passed her. On my way back, I stopped.

"Hey [Name]," I said. She lowered her headphones.

"Yeah?"

"Did you get that thing figured out, the other day?"
[I couldn't remember exactly what it was, so yeah.]

"Yeah [words I can't remember despite it only being, like, three/four minutes ago Dx]."

She might have said thanks. One thing she did do, was smile. c:

(Huzzahs.)

If I were a Sim, once more, I believe my "Social" bar would have raised.

We may not be (or ever will be) friends, but we can get along. Good griefous knows we must have the BFA Senior Seminar class together during Spring. o3o

(Also, as a Christian, I know I should treat others as Christ would treat them. It is hard, but I made an effort, and it was not snubbed.)

Huzzahs, once more. c:

Sunday, January 17, 2016

January 17 - Adulting with TBI Round Two

Hello again.

Despite the title, this is going to be a positive post (for the most part, I hope, haha).

EDIT: I started this post a couple of hours ago, and I'm starting to feel down again. No huzzahs. :/

Anywho, back to the topic at hand.

I was (and still am) alone in the apartment built for four college students on campus. The reason why I'm alone is because one girl/woman (egads) got married (EGADS) and, therefore, was required to move off campus. Another girl/woman went home for the weekend, and has yet to return. The third is not here very often, so... idk. -shrug-

Anywho (times two) ((hey, that rhymed! /tangent)), I was doing laundry and homework and whatnot, and I left my room within my apartment to go to the bathroom. The door shut behind me. Not a big deal, right? Wrong. :/

Apparently, the doorknob hit the wall when I had last opened it, thus activating the lock. And where is my key, you ask? In my (locked) room. :/
(As is my cellphone, laptop, UMSOWEITER [German for AND SO ON Dx])

I think to myself, I'll ask a friend to call Campus Safety for me. I go to several (by that, I mean two [I don't know many people in this building :/]) people's rooms, but to no avail. (I did place something to prop the door open, though, so as to not get locked out of the apartment as well, so huzzahs for that.)

I thought about calling my parents, but that was going to be a last resort. So I look around the apartment and GASPER GRAPES PAGERS what do I have on the fridge? A flyer for the college library with its phone number on it!

So I call that number (using my nifty landline that I use to call my parents on the Westside so as to avoid eating up my Tracfone minutes), get the number for Campus Safety, call Campus Safety, and get my room unlocked.

Huzzahs for that. c:

Also, I am about to go to Merge tonight, and see Heidi. (Honestly, I'm not a humongous fan of Heidi's personality, but hey, socializing, I guess. o3o)

Also, also, I have yet to finish my three to four page SINGLE-SPACED paper for German, but it's not due until midnight tonight, and all I need to do is write the conclusion and look over it. So imma do that after Merge. o3o

/finfornow c:

Friday, January 15, 2016

January 15 - Too Close to Home (Literally)

I am currently in tears right now.

I don't want to be. I want to be happy. I want to be NOT depressed.

I am in the middle of writing my story for Advanced Tutorial Fiction, and the story line is hitting WAY too close to home. I knew that going into it, but I thought I could handle it. I'm not sure if I can anymore (at least now how it's currently going, character development wise.)

What I need to do, is scrap what I have, to develop the characters in different directions, to NOT make it so autobiographical.

What I need to do (2.0), is get a hold of myself. Honestly, suicide went through my mind once again, but NO, I WILL NOT COMMIT SUICIDE, DANG IT. GOD WOULD NOT WANT ME TO DO THAT.

(Honestly, I just had an image in my mind [if I did do it {WHICH I'M NOT}] of God seeing me, and saying, "Daughter, I am disappoint." Which made me think, lol and yet ALAS / NO HUZZAHS / GIFT HORSE / ETC. Dx)

I... am going to put away my laptop for now. I... am going to go to dinner in Gee. (Yay quesadillas? :/) But, YAY FOR FRIENDS.

Also, the Winter Ball is tonight. It's my last one. Honestly, I was leaning toward not going in the middle of my current CF (crying fit, for those who are not me), but now, I'm leaning towards yes. Because socializing, because getting our of this blasted room.

(Also, I received an email from the Fulbright committee saying they passed on my application. I'm sure my parents will be happy; I know they were concerned about me with my BI recovery whatnots and the refugee whatnots and stuff. I'm like, well dang, but at least I tried? Idk.)

Also, also, I did NOT take a Lorazepam due to my CF. I went back to my "Notes to Self" document, and discovered I have not had a Lor since early December 2015. I DON'T WANT TO BREAK THE STREAK. O3O

Also, also, also, I just texted my Dad saying I love him whole bunches. Yeah.

Imma go to Gee now (for serious, this time). Toodles.

Dear Lord,

Thank you for this day. Thank you that I was able to get through this past CF without a Lorazepam. (I mean, I'm happy they exist, but I'm also happy I didn't HAVE to take it.)

Please let me have a good time tonight with friends at the dance.

(Please let this blasted headache go away finally, egads Dx)

Please give me peace about the future, about post-grad. Please, Lord.

Please help me get through these two (TWO!) Jan term classes (FOR CREDIT). Please give me guidance to do what's best for me, regardless of what others think and/or say (like my parents, my therapist, etc.) Please.

(And thank you that I stopped crying. PTL for that.)

In Your Name, Lord,
Amen <3 p="">

Tuesday, January 12, 2016

January 12 - Shame :c

So, in the past, I had to get a handicap placard in order to park in handicapped parking spaces. At the time, I was having intense mobility issues (I believe I may have been using a walker occasionally) so it made sense. (Also, something about my mother with jury duty, but that's another thing.)

My placard doesn't expire until my birthday 2017 (so basically in a year). As such, I am legally allowed to use it.

I know that in the past, a woman basically called me out for parking in a handicapped spot on Main Street with my friend. My friend said something along the lines of, she has a sign, but I still moved my car (to another handicapped spot down the street, but still).

Once more, two other people have mentioned the handicapped space privilege, my dad and a friend, [H]. My dad said something like, don't use the handicapped spaces in the senior apartment parking lot, because someone's parent or someone else visiting could really use it. [H] said something like how a friend of hers with a physical impairment really needs it, so when they are full, she has to walk a longer distance which is taxing on her. I thought to myself, yeah, but there's two handicap spaces in the senior apartments, if I take one, it's not a thing, right?

Today I was walking to Work Study, and I started walking alongside of a girl/woman who had a limp in her step. I have seen her in the past, and I know that this is not new; she probably has a handicap placard (if not, then she would DEFINITELY be eligible for one Dx).

Because of this, I am going to revise my parking choices. I don't want to unfairly take advantage of a privilege endowed to me due to something that's not really much of an issue anymore. :c

(However, I do have sight issues that the ophthalmologist [egads, spelling Dx] said he highly doubts will improve. I'm still dealing with that. :C)

However, however, there are other parking spaces in the Dexter parking lot I can use. Yeah, I think I'll do that.

Dear Lord,

Thank you for this day. Thank you for all the blessings I have received. Thank you that I AM getting better, that I AM alive, that I AM able to go to college, get a degree (two, in fact [!]). Please help me keep in mind how much You have blessed me.

In Your name, Lord,
Amen <3 nbsp="" p="">

Friday, January 8, 2016

January 8 - Simming It Up

Hello once more. :)

Yes, I know it's late (though I believe my time is still set for MST on this account, I believe, considering I created it way back in Arizona, lol. xD)

I just got back from a movie night with my adopted little and others in that group. It was great.

We definitely watched Inside Out. It was the second movie we watched. They are still there watching Big Hero Six. We also watched another movie before Inside Out (which I had likewise previously seen), but I can't seem to remember it right now.

I could probably remember it if I spend more time thinking about it. (Heck, it will probably flash into my brain either as I'm writing this or sometime during the night.)

(AND, I just looked on Facebook, and lo and behold, my adopted little's status is the first one I see, in which she states that we watched the movie Home first. Thank you, adopted little c:.)

Like, I know that in the GRAND scheme of things, the fact that we watched Home first is NOT a big deal (if any deal at all). However, however, however, stuff. Reasons. Gift horse. Meh.

The reason why I titled this post "Simming It Up" is because I used to play the computer game The Sims 2 a lot (and I mean a WHOLE lot Dx). On said game, each character has different bars for different needs, such as Hunger and Energy. I believe that, if I were a Sim, my Social bar would be quite full right now. Huzzahs to that.

And on that positive note, I bid you adieu. Adieu!

<3 p="">

Wednesday, January 6, 2016

January 6 - Immigration (Round 2)

So, it was not just the one site that reported about this event.

The Blaze - http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2016/01/05/amid-refugee-influx-germany-hit-with-unthinkable-new-years-eve-violence-committed-by-men-of-arab-or-north-african-appearance/?utm_source=Sailthru&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Firewire%20-%20HORIZON%201-5-16%20FINAL&utm_term=Firewire
Deutsche Welle - http://www.dw.com/en/a-new-dimension-of-sexual-assault-in-cologne/a-18959299

(Sorry Dad. :c)

((Er, es tut mir leid, Vatti. :c))

It kind of, really bothers me that a) this happened to begin with and b) I didn't hear about it sooner from a reputable news source. :/ BAH / NO HUZZAHS / ETC.

Dear Lord,

Please be with Germany. Bitte. Bitte. Bitte.

In Your name, Lord,
Amen. <3 p="">

Monday, January 4, 2016

January 4 - Immigration

So I just received this article in an email from my dad - http://www.breitbart.com/london/2016/01/04/revealed-1000-migrants-brawl-rape-sexually-assault-steal-one-german-train-station-new-years-eve/.

I have many things to say/write about this (none of which I currently plan on sharing with my father).

1 - I am NOT impressed by the amount of grammar fails within the article (for example, placing the period or the comma outside the quotation marks).

That is a sign of lack of professionalism imo. Like, if they can't even copy edit the article correctly, how can I trust what they put inside said article?

2 - I REALLY WISH my dad would stop it. Just stop it. I'm not going on the Jan term trip to Germany (obviously), and I don't know as of yet about the Fulbright, about whether or not I will receive it. (As of right now, I am unsure about whether or not I would accept it, should I get offered it, but I'll cross that bridge [with prayer and God's guidance!] if/when I get there.)

DON'T GET ME WRONG. THERE IS NOTHING GOOD ABOUT THIS SITUATION.

However, Germany is much wilder in general than the US. (Goodness knows that even when I was there back in high school, the crowds were rowdy, such as after a fußball game.) But did I tell my dad that? Nope, because I knew he would freak out. :/

(Also, the links at the bottom of the article made me doubt the credibility of the source even more, but then I thought to myself, wait, those are the same sorts of links as are on TheBlaze's website too, right? Alas. :c)

Dear Lord,

Please be with Germany. Please be with its citizens and the refugees currently residing there. Please don't let the actions of a few hurt the prospects of the many. :c

Please be with me as I finish out this school year. Please give me guidance about the Fulbright if I should be offered it.

Please be with my dad.

Please be with Grandpa Noel as he is in the hospital. Please heal him.

(Please be with Mom when he passes away. Please.)

In your name, Lord,
Amen.

UPDATE - 1.5.16

So I read this other article (http://www.latimes.com/nation/la-na-ff-militia-oregon-20160103-story.html) and there was a similar error.

"A day earlier, he told reporters that the men intended to overthrow of the government."

However, this one came from the LA Times website. :/

(Seriously, LA Times? Seriously?)

Bah / alas / egads / etc. Dx

Friday, January 1, 2016

January 1 - 2016 (!)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I spent the night at a friend's apartment last night, because she is all adult-y and living on her own now. Egads, that should be me in a year. :X I almost didn't go, but I'm glad I did. c:

Today, I went out with another friend for lunch and shopping. F used to attend the same college as me, but transferred to another, nearby one during the year I was out, I believe. Because of this, she was on track to graduate 2014, but will be graduating 2016, the same year as me (because she changed majors, as well).

F asked me what I wanted to do post-grad, living-wise. I said that my parents really wanted to move out of the South. She has mentioned rooming together post-grad before, but I'm not sure about that. I talked/wrote to R (a mutual friend who lived previously in New Hampshire) about that, and she said she wasn't sure about F's ability to live away from her parents, honestly. However, that was over a year ago, I believe.

Idk. I need to focus on one day at a time.

In other news, I just finished reading through my "Notes to Self" document that I started in 2014 sometime. And yes, I have come a long way. P to the T to the L.

Dear Lord,

Thank You for this day. Thank You for ALL of the blessings You have given me.
Thank You for sticking with me through all of this, even/especially when I have doubted You.
Please give me peace, wisdom, and guidance about the future.
Please help Dad with his work situation.
Please help me when I communicate with my parents about stuff. (o3o)
And finally (for tonight/right now at least, lol), please BLESS this year of 2016.

In Your name, Lord,
Amen (less than three :) )